i just cut my hair!!
and i look ugly. :(
SAD CASE. TULAH DEGIL SANGATKAN.
CUTTING HAIR AT THE BARBER makes you look stupid




Euro 2008 is around the corner. and im having the football vibes again.
Of course, as usual. ALLEZ LES BLEUS. FRANCE.



merci zizou.
youre the greatest footballer of all times.
along with the other greats, pele, maradona, and now you zinedine zidane.
perfect technique, motion and flawless footwork. salute.
though youre not playing for les blues anymore.

i know france will win this time. woohoo.




today started off badly. i was late for school. and my teacher didnt let me in. she told me to wait outside cause she wanted to talk to me. but i decline and decided not to go class and stayed in the canteen. and carried on playing psp.

after the blablas. was contemplating whether to go for prayers or not. so in the end, i did. and when i came back. wahhh. havoc or what. the class was in a heated argument. about blogging, critics and bad-mouthing people. well. i shant say anymore since its past. so yea. i was not in the picture SO instead i took pictures of myself using hasif's incredible Sony Vaio(which is infected by a trojan horse from my phone memory card. lol. sorry). its good shit fun taking distorted pictures and stuff.

my parents are going to thailand next week. and that leaves me and the house all to myself. sad that i cant spend the time with her. but too bad. i'll make adjustments. perhaps i shall bring my bestfrens over to play risk. or watch movies. downpart is my exam is on the 9th of june. but its just one paper and i dont seem to have any problems with administration. i wont say its easy though. just less challenging. common sense can say also.

tomorow is saturday and i want to make it a point to go and play a full game(hopefully) in the match. Khani(dani) Alves. haha. dreaming. i need to find a job soon. gonna buy a new bike. and this time, its really gonna be my baby. i hope to pay full though. had a bad experience paying a bike on loan. scary man. no more uncle-uncle bike. its the beastly and powerful XR 400. a dirtbike. low on appearance, but the power of it. made me smirk. :) 3k for a decent one. SOON, REAL SOON.

my aims short term:
1)Class 3 license
2)Class 2a license
3)job
4)someone new perhaps? haha. fuck it la. no way.
5)more new friends. i gonna be friendly and nice again.
6)fun fun fun.
7)if its not an xr4, i might get a ktm2 though. PURELY FOR RACE.

if i start racing, and i die from it, at least i know, i died happy.


sometimes when you try so hard, it get harder.takpela khai. its not fated for you i guess. lifes unfair. so let it go. really. if youre worth it, you'll know what will happen.




seems all so easy for you.




met the bestest best friends for late dinner.
andi's treat but only teh tarik. aiyah, his treat, standard. cheapskate. haha.
he just passed his Class 2a for bike. congrats congrats.

We were slacking till someone mentioned about soccer, at cage. On friday the 13th.
not really a fengshui-assured day but bet its gonna be awesome. arniz said on the next meeting we'll discuss about the cage again. and we'll write the names of those who are confirmed playing. then everybody will be allocated a number. so arniz will bring his bingo machine, then we'll some sort of draw lots to determine who's on which team. out of fairness. lol.

It's like a mini-league. Im feeling enthu now. weehoo.

on a side-note,
im down to last my stick. and after this, im so done and over smoking. :)
thanks melissa and adi for you encouragement.




i guess what im gonna say, is gonna sound mushy and make me look foolish, will show that im going against the words ive said.ignoring what my dear close friends have told me so. But.. i think i need and want to clear this out. With a heavy heart of course.

i dont know whether im selfish. stuckup. egoistic. whatnots.i mean, i feel that whenever im with -, i chuck it aside.being with -, for that short period of time. i felt it was ages. which was really good for me. i wanted to stop time even. its not that i cant move on now, or im just a loser whom dwells over his lost and shits. i seriously know, that some of you reading, and perhaps -, you might not care, might. Im not angry though.

I just starting to miss, sharing my life with -, yea, i agree with you saying that you'll be here and meeting me and stuff. but ít wont be the same. its not that im assuming. its just that, i question myself, what did you want me for? its this question it all boils from. i wont go deeper into this. i really did mean what i say to -, every single word. from the songs lyrics ive sent, to the ones i made my own.
flashbacks when we just sit around at my place, we would just hug and stare at each other and smile, it all seemed certain. ever wondered why i didnt stop doing those small suprises for you? it was because everytime i did it, you would give me that long stare and smile, afterwhich i felt so shy and try to make you stop.

im tired of sitting here, looking and waiting for you to make your moves. putting my hopes so high and hoping you would reciprocate my actions. you did, and you always left me feeling so happy i swore i'd never leave you ever. You can choose how you want to lead and live your life now, like you said, you'll manage it with flying colours, im really sure you will, im not being sarcastic. But you cant tell me to be around, waiting for YOU to be ready but then dont tell me you want me, and it means the whole world to you but you cant give your 100%. Cant you see, it was all about YOU. i was being so selfless that i didnt cared for my feelings. i do complain to you at times, but thats just 1% of it. i bet you didnt know how bad i felt when i ignored my feelings so that you would feel happy. If you love me, why must you hesitate? If im not good enough for you, say it to me honestly, dont make me wait and accompany you until you find the person you want and leave me hanging and at the end of the day when youve found someone you like, ditch me. by then you wont feel anything, you wont care.


They'll say that im stupid, always giving in to you. always being there for you, thinking about you. thinking of ways to suprise you. Ultimately, letting myself be used by you. Dont say that i deserve someone better, in my opinion after all i've been through and done, dont you think i deserve you? treating me better? but i guess, its no use to say anymore. But i really love you so much and care for you, even if it means hitting my head on the wall, sucking the life out of me. I want you to be happy, and i hope you know that, i'll still be here if you need to confide, a secret or you need to bitch about something. I'll always find the time to listen and comfort you. i know i can do that, and i mean it, from the bottom of my heart.

I dont know, but i think maybe its time for me to choose how MY life will go about.
i may be dumb to not take the time to realize who would truly love me, and not just say it but do it. actions speak louder that words. you should know that. But I think, maybe im just scared that i didn't want to find the world in someone, because if she ever goes away, she'd take my entire world with her. But ive already found the world in you, and i guess you took my world away. And this is why im letting you go, perhaps its better for you. i dont care if im gonna end up alone for the rest of my life. let's just see. but.. whatever it is.. i'll alway cherish you and the good times we've had. I sincerely am sorry if i made you cry or feel sad and bad. really,
If you ever think that, i'm the one and good enough for you. i'll be glad to hug you again and love you like nobody's business. but be sure youre ready for it and love me for who i am. im sorry and i loved you and only you, with all my heart. Goodbye sayang.




so exam's coming on 9th of june.
one paper only though, not so bad.
just concentrate and study my ass off this time.

i need and want to get an A.
i know im capable of doing so, from the first year actually.
its just a matter of how bad i want it.
oh wells, now i really want it badly.

gonna jam with andi and arniz around this week, thursday perhaps.
i hope when we start playing on a regular basis,
we'll go busk arnd orchard and donate all the money to charity funds
for the victims of natural disasters.
not for some, lazy inbreds in rehabs pretending to stop drugs.

and and, i want to start building my body.
all soft already. lol. not going for mass or big muscles.
just some nice shapes would be great.
i want to go to the ZOOOOOO and SENTOSAAAA. :):):)

good afternoon.




some songs just make me smile.




It was the first time, since ages. really.
i had fun with my bestest of friends.
Khalid was going to meet nurul,
andi was with siti,
adi was with fazir at some gig,
arniz was with his gf too,
azri somewhere im not sure.

i thought, okayla, nevermind,
might as well, just try to sleep my day off,
But khalid called, and asked me to join him sheesha,
he said, it was on him, so andi also wanted to come along,
rode there with andi and siti, so when we reached there,
it was kind of relaxing, me, khalid, andi, nurul and siti.
i felt awkward though, like alone. but it was cool.
THEN, somehow, somewhat, everybody started to call me.
Azri, arniz and adi, so they all wanted to join us,
and at the end of the day, there were about 10 of us?

Its funny how, when we planned, things dont seem to work well,
but unplanned like yesterday, EVERYBODY turned up. how great.
after sheesha, i went home to change while waiting for andi, khalid,
azri, arniz, adi to meet under my block.
we went to downtown E!Hub to play bowling, but it was completely fullhouse,
and when we checked my name in the waiting list, 28people before us. shocking.
so, we decided to wait, and wait, and wait, until arniz saw one of his friends,
and they were kind enough to let us continue after they were done, cut queue so to speak hehe. but while waiting, azri was being gay and he started to bang our butts, after which it turned into a game, and in turn, all of us were being paranoid of each other, looking back each time we walk and laughing our ass off.

Then we played a little shopping mall catching khalid being the victim catcher. haha. we were so bummed out, we decided to hang around the lounge area, some lying down and some listening to music and cooling down. We met arniz's brother and he joined us for bowling. It was the best bowling i ever had, obviously the noisiest, and shouting and applauding each time any of us strikes. all sorts of gestures, and actions like dancing robot, ppowerslides. haha. i guess, it brought out the kid in us. Fun. Im blessed with the bestfriends in the world. They hold secrets and are generally(and suprisingly)understanding. Unlike some. Anyways, i think its best, that we dont meet like almost everyday, because we have more fun, or rather the penultimate fun if we get together and actually dont plan it. lol.

arsenal arsenal will be great next season,
man u will fight with us but eventually crash,
chelski will stumble and burn.
liverfool, as always, the fool out of the four.






hi. 5.35am and i just got back home, bathe and all.
a day to remember? or to forget?
kept thinking, what was wrong.
guess, im just a surplus.
disposable, just for convenience sake...
a pat on my own back,
you did great, really great.
just too bad, it cant be reciprocated.
not miserable, just disappointed.
well, if its fated, it will happen. i guess.

On another note, i think people shouldnt judge just by listening to one side/version of a story. i think its very shallow for one to do that. its okay, if it comes from a girl, i mean girls do gossip and stuff. BUT, if it comes from a guy, hah, shows how gay he is. Come on, if you dont know the whole story, dont go around and tell people about it. not happy, confront settle the matter the gentleman's way. not bitch. im glad, i really am glad, i have the best of friends. they might not be perfect, but definitely the best.

I would like to tell them, Andi Adi Khalid Arniz Fazir Azri Qirin NurulIzyan KakEmil Ariff Elia and i might miss out on some, Thanks guys. These people got my back, and when i fell, they extended their hands to bring me up. I love you guys. Thanks alot. I mean it. :) <3

Then lastly, comes a special person. I guess, things might not work out. Maybe youre right, youre not ready. All i got to say, Lets see. Lets just see what will happen next. No, im not putting any high hopes, im just curious as to what the future holds. Okay, im tired now.

What a day...


Goodnight.

Khairul Anwar
TwenTEEN
29/12/1988
Singular
Driven







Yesterday is history, Tomorrow is Mystery, Today, is a gift. That is why it is called the PRESENT

Exit.

Blogger
Farhanis
Syafiqah
Kak Emil
Melissa
Hidayah
Qadriyah
Nurul Ain
Nurul Huda
Siti Durain
Nurul Izyan
Diyanah
Fareez
Jannah
Shira

Snippets

May 2008

June 2008

July 2008

August 2008

September 2008

October 2008

November 2008

December 2008

September 2009

October 2009

November 2009

December 2009

February 2010

MUZEEKA